So I’ve always thought the women running the cafeteria downstairs looked a lot like villains from a Dukes of Hazzard episode. They’re probably in their late 30s but because of 25 years of smoking Menthols and drinking Busch lite, they each look like they’re in their late 50s. Add to that their accents resembling North Georgia Hill people with a 3rd grade education and you have a recipe for a really awkward experience. Like this past friday’s:
I was in sort of a hurry so I went against my better judgment and ran downstairs to get some lunch. I surveilled the offerings and found the usual: white bread, kraft singles, stale lettuce, and cheap deli meat. So I asked what I thought was a perfectly reasonable question:
Me: “Ma’am, do you have any kaiser rolls today?”
DoH Villain #1: (without looking up from what she was doing. and add to the mountainpeople accent a certain amount of lethargy and I-don’t-give-a-shit attitude that can only come from a Wild Bills induced hangover) “Sweeeeeetheart, its Friday. I don’t have the time or energy to make anything spicy”
Me: “Uhhhh — wait, something spicy?”
DoH Villain #1: (keeps her head lowered and looks up at me with these eyes that says “Boy, do I LOOK like I do custom orders??”)
Me: “Yeaaaaah (looking at one of my co-workers). Wanna go to Publix?”
And so it is.
#1 written by B. Muehleman August 24th, 2010 at 16:22
She must have thought you said KLAIDENTROLL which in low german means spicy sauerbraten. this is a dish brought to the hills of appalachia many years ago. being around your brother must be making you slur your words. Publix was probably a better choice anyway.
#2 written by TJ August 24th, 2010 at 16:41
HA! Well done Pop!
#3 written by B. Muehleman August 30th, 2010 at 17:42
Is anybody out there still alive? I feel we are in a post apoctoliptic world sometimes. By the way we did’nt care much for the book of eli. Talk to you soon.
#4 written by Amy September 2nd, 2010 at 03:09
i got butter on my toast from the deli downstairs. lots and lots of butter. ugh. if you want it done right, you have to do it yourself.
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